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News

Pam Bondi’s pie-face moment

While the majority of state and local interests support marriage equality, conservative detractors are mired in bad optics

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“It’s also [Attorney General Pam Bondi’s] job to make sure that citizens of her state are not discriminated against. And courts throughout the country have resoundingly found that the ban against marriage equality discriminates against gay and lesbian people.”

– Elizabeth Schwartz, attorney in the Miami-Dade case representing six same-sex couples suing for the right to marry

JUST THE STATS

 

$383,000

Amount of taxpayer money the state attorney general’s office spent defending the state’s gay adoption ban before losing the case in Florida’s Third District Court of Appeal in 2010. $120,000 of that was used for disgraced anti-gay witness George Rekers

 

$70,000

Amount of taxpayer money the state attorney general’s office spent fighting Obamacare for two years before the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that the Affordable Care Act was constitutional

 

$93.50

Amount a heterosexual couple pays for a marriage license in the state of Florida

Bondi-ed out

It’s probably safe to assume that if you’re reading this, Florida has not (yet!) been the lucky beneficiary of apocalyptic lightning bolts or a final-judgment-sized superstorm called, pleasantly enough, God’s Wrath. In fact, you’re probably just sulkily dabbing the humidity from your personal heat index and carrying on with your own miserable existence while allowing others to do the same, right? Silence is easy!

But if the litigious powers that be are to be believed – and when we say powers that be, we’re looking at you, Gov. Rick Scott and sidekick Attorney General Pam Bondi – we should all be down on our knees (wink!) and afraid of everything. Just over a week before a July 2 hearing for summary judgment before Miami-Dade Circuit Judge Sarah Zabel in the Pareto v. Ruvin case, which seeks to overturn the state’s marriage ban, Bondi cracked open the door and said something like, “Hey, y’all, is this where the party is?” It was probably more like, “I’m here to eradicate the ‘public harm’ the gays intend to inflict on the Sunshine State, because nobody else seems to want to.”

Even though Bondi has already endured the monthlong public-and-press shaming brought about by her quizzical word cloud of bigotry, she filed two motions on June 24 stating that she would pick up the slack on two pending gay marriage cases that she doesn’t think are being defended rigorously enough. It’s her job to protect the will of the people, see, and more than 60 percent of Florida’s people were willed into erroneously voting for Amendment 2 in 2008 because “yes” and “no” are confusing in the context of a rights ban.

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