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COLUMN

Happytown

The state of the city is fake, the state of the state is harrowing, state of the art cameras are watching you steal flowers and state Dems seek an altered state.

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Before we could ask if cops really used to hide in trees, O'Grady was already onto the next subject, talking about how the always-recording IRIS cameras could address MetroWest's recent problems with … flower theft. He confirmed that yes, the cameras could zoom, quite extensively, and when we wondered aloud if that zoom could replicate the detail of a human face just as our eyes could, he replied: "Just about."

We excused ourselves to mop up our 
techno-gasm, only to bump into Sergeant Barbara Jones, OPD's public information officer, who had just gotten the program displaying the IRIS live feeds installed on her laptop: "I sit at my desk," she says, and "I can see if there's someone lying on the street." Amazing.

Apparently, the Democrats in the Florida Legislature are so exasperated at their impotence that they're ready to light up a joint - House Joint Resolution 1407, that is, sponsored by freshman Democratic legislator Jeff Clemens. The resolution aims to put the decriminalization of medical marijuana to the test of a constitutional amendment in 2012, which would require 60 percent of the electorate to vote for it.

If the resolution doesn't pass, which is almost assuredly the case, the amendment would need 676,811 voter signatures to get onto the ballot, which the folks at People United for Medical Marijuana (PUFMM) have been working on - to limited success, as we first reported last November. Currently, the group has only 26,455 signed petitions, and PUFMM spokesperson Kim Russell would rather not deal with the bullshit of collecting signatures. "[Clemens is] just bypassing the process - which saves us a whole lot of work," she says.

But, again, the bill doesn't stand a chance, so what Russell is left with, as usual, is the vague optimism of someday: "This is just a stepping stone," Russell says. "What it's going to do is start a conversation."

Here's to a very long conversation. Here's to altered states.

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