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COLUMN

Savage Love

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How on earth do you stick your hand in a guy’s underpants – how do you go under a guy’s underwear – without actually touching the guy’s cock? Anyway, your new boyfriend did have a physical reaction when you were fooling around: His dick got hard. He didn’t have the same over-the-top reaction to your bizarre moves that other guys had in the past, GAY, but getting an erection when a girl sticks her hand in your underpants is a pretty good indication that a guy isn’t gay. It’s also possible that he wanted to pant, writhe and beg, but he restrained himself because you had banned “anything below the belt” and your great new boyfriend didn’t want you to feel pressured to go further than you were comfortable with.

My wonderful boyfriend and I have been in a monogamish relationship for five years. We’re both GGG, and we have had a few threesomes involving women, a fantasy both of us shared. My biggest fantasy, however, is to be with two men. I’ve brought it up with my BF, but he just doesn’t find men attractive and isn’t into it. Now a former fling of mine (male) told me that he finds my BF attractive and would love to be with both of us. The two sexiest men I’ve ever known together with me would be an absolute wet dream come true! I feel like my BF is a little nervous about being with another man because A) he has performance anxiety and/or B) he’s not comfortable exploring his sexuality (he grew up in a small town and was teased a lot about being gay because he was in theater). If he could get past his insecurities, I feel like he might enjoy himself. Should I just give up this dream?
Wishes He Were A Little Bi

Your boyfriend isn’t bi, WHWALB, he’s not even heteroflexible, and he’s made it clear that he’s turned off by the idea of a threesome with another male. Even if you could talk him into it, arranging a threesome with a dude who has expressed a sexual interest in your boyfriend would be disrespectful and potentially disastrous. Drop it.

Dan speaks with New York Times columnist Seth Stephens-Davidowitz on the true demographics of gays in the United States: savagelovecast.com.

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