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COLUMN

Savage Love

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Some people are turned on by completely random shit, and no one quite knows why. Probably something to do with our big brains – I mean, just think of all those billions of nerve endings, all those synapses making connections, all those formative childhood experiences that get all synapsed up and become adult erotic obsessions. Think of all that and then count your lucky stars that studying turns you on. If there were a way to bottle and sell your kink, no one would ever need to take Adderall again.

No question here, just a thank-you. Last week, my 16-year-old son told me that he has a crush on his best friend … who just so happens to be a 16-year-old boy. I’ve known he was gay since he was about 4, but without your column, I don’t think I would’ve been prepared for his “revelation.” You and your readers taught me the importance of letting him know that I will always accept him, love him and support him in any decision he makes. The best part: He wasn’t really worried about telling me he’s gay; he was worried that I wouldn’t let his crush spend the night anymore. (And he was right to worry!)
Proud Mom

After reading that you intend to “support [your son] in any decision he makes,” I started to compose a mildly scolding response in my head. (“Why would you do that? Gay kids, like straight kids, need their parents to be their parents. Your son needs you to meddle lovingly, to criticize constructively and to help him pull his big gay head out of his big gay ass when it needs pulling. And it will, because gay kids make bad decisions, too.”) But you made it clear at the end of your letter – he was right to worry about those sleepovers being over – that you aren’t confusing “support my gay son” with “sign off on any damn thing my gay son wants.” Well done!

I am an 18-year-old British queer girl who was recently involved with an older woman while visiting the United States. She told me about your “campsite rule,” and she followed it to the letter and was generally wonderful. I’ve since moved back to London and told everyone I know about your column. As a result, there’s a small group of teens running around North London that adores you. I hope we can spread your excellent advice and make as many people as possible into GGG partners.
CC

Thanks for the lovely note, CC, and tell the older woman I said thanks – for honoring the campsite rule and for helping to build my readership in the U.K. by turning you on to my column.

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