What's Hot
What's Going On

Calendar

Search thousands of events in our database.

Restaurants

Search hundreds of restaurants in our database.

Nightlife

Search hundreds of clubs in our database.

Orlando Daily Deals powered by ReferLocal

OW on Twitter
OW on Facebook
Print Email

COLUMN

Savage Love

I'm a straight man from Southern California and I really want to be a straight male escort

You can read Dominick's column at Rentboy.com. Dominick has also written for the Red Umbrella Diaries, a sex workers' reading series in New York City. It takes place on the first Thursday of every month at Happy Ending. Dominick is curating the October Red Umbrella Diaries, and sex workers – escort, massage, porn, phone, stripper – with stories to tell can email him at askdominick@gmail.com.

I'm a 22-year-old woman and I lost myvirginity in September 2011, but I had experienced everything else before that. My question is about when a guy goes down on me: How come I can never fully enjoy it? How come I find it hard to enjoy any aspect of it? Is the problem that I've never experienced oral with someone who knows what he's doing? Or is it my own mental block? What I mean by “mental block” is this: I personally think it's gross and I can't imagine why a guy would want to do that to me. So the entire time he's down there, I'm stressing out about whether he really likes it. I try to focus on relaxing and blocking those thoughts out, but in the end, I always end up pulling his head back up, since I don't see myself ever experiencing an orgasm during it and, frankly, I get bored.

Is it my mental block that's stopping me from enjoying oral? Or am I just having bad luck with guys in that area?

Erotic Anxiety Time

The only way to determine what exactly your problem is – your pussy-paralyzing insecurities? Their pussy-disabling ineptitude? – is to work on conquering your insecurities while at the same time allowing the guy(s) you're seeing to go down on you once in a while. If you get over your insecurities about your genitals, and then oral is suddenly awesome, well, then the problem was your insecurities. If you don't get over your insecurities but find yourself coming like crazy with a new boy between your legs, well, then all the other boys who ever ate your pussy were the problem.

And it's fine for you to think eating pussy is gross – you're a straight girl, after all, and you're not attracted to women. But guys who dig women dig pussy, EAT, and you don't have to like the idea of eating pussy to enjoy having yours eaten.

I am a 26-year-old straight girl and a virgin. I could delve into the reasons why (shy, late bloomer, average-looking, conservative family), but I will spare you and cut to the chase: I really, really want to lose my virginity. It's driving me crazy! All I want is a safe, anonymous one-time thing so I can move on, and I'm not outgoing/flirtatious/pretty enough to meet men at bars. My question: Straight male escorts – do they exist? How would I find one? Being with someone understanding, experienced and professional sounds like exactly what I'm looking for. Honestly, I've thought about this for a while. I don't think people who develop normally can really understand the sort of desperation I feel.

Very Concerned About Retarded Development

Wannabe straight male escorts exist, VCARD, as STUD's letter proves. But there aren't enough straight female wannabe clients out there to support a straight-female-specific website or agency for straight male escorts, as Dominick's response to STUD proves. However, a lot of the male escorts on gay-specific escort websites are bisexual; some are even highly heteroflexible gay-for-pay straight guys. Spend some time dinking around on a gay escort site, and it won't be long before you run across an ad posted by a male escort who identifies as bi. The guy could be lying – some gay escorts will claim to be straight or bi to attract gay male clients who get off on sleeping with straight guys – so you may not hear back from the first bi or straight escort you send an email to. But keep looking, email any guy who strikes your fancy, and be upfront about who you are and what you're looking for.

We welcome user discussion on our site, under the following guidelines:

To comment you must first create a profile and sign-in with a verified DISQUS account or social network ID. Sign up here.

Comments in violation of the rules will be denied, and repeat violators will be banned. Please help police the community by flagging offensive comments for our moderators to review. By posting a comment, you agree to our full terms and conditions. Click here to read terms and conditions.
comments powered by Disqus