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COLUMN

Savage Love

I'm a 21-year-old woman from Canada who sleeps with other women.

If that doesn’t do the trick, buy your boyfriend a dildo that’s roughly the same size as his dick. Then tell him he can fuck your hole whenever he wants, for as long as he wants – so long as he fucks his own hole first, while you watch, for at least 20 minutes or so. Then he can fuck yours.

That might help him appreciate how good he’s got it.

Never heard of you until a year ago. I’m into “ball busting” – getting slapped or kicked in the nuts – but my wife was never willing. I did something stupid and saw an escort, just to get my balls busted (no sex), and my wife found out. She was talking about divorce when she told her best friend what was going on. Her friend told her to read your archives first.

You probably don’t hear this from conservative Christian Republicans in red states very often, Mr. Savage, but my sense of honor requires it of me: Thank you for saving my marriage. This “GGG” concept of yours transformed our marriage – it also led my wife to either discover or open up about her kink – and we are happier than ever. It isn’t lost on me that I have a gay man to thank for keeping us from becoming another sad divorce statistic.

Busted And Loving Life Supremely

You’re welcome, BALLS, and all I ask in return for saving your marriage – besides video – is your support for the full legal recognition of mine. Deal?

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