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COLUMN

Free Will Astrology

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ARIES (March 21-April 19) Normally, International CAPS LOCK DAY happens only once a year, on June 28. But you have been granted the right to observe the next seven days as your own personal International CAPS LOCK DAYS. That means you will probably be forgiven and tolerated if you use OVERHEATED ORATORY and leap to THUNDEROUS CONCLUSIONS and engage in MELODRAMATIC GESTURES. You may even be thanked – although it’s important to note that the gratitude you receive may only come later, AFTER THE DUST HAS SETTLED.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) William Turner was a 19th-century English landscape painter born under the sign of Taurus. His aim was not to capture scenes in realistic detail, but rather to convey the emotional impact they made on him. He testified that on one occasion he had himself tied to the mast of a ship during a snowstorm so that he could experience its full effects firsthand. The result was “Snow Storm – Steam-Boat off a Harbor’s Mouth,” a painting composed mostly of
tempestuous swirls. What would be the equivalent for you? I’m trying to think of a way you could be perfectly safe as you treated yourself to an up-close encounter with elemental energies.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20) Some years back, the Greek government launched a huge anti-smoking campaign. In response, cigarette sales spiked dramatically. When my daughter was 6 years old, I initiated a crusade to ban Barbie dolls from our home forever. Soon she was ripping out pictures of the accursed anti-feminist icon from toy catalogs and leaving them on my desk. With these events in mind, I’m feeling cautious about trying to talk you into formulating a five-year master plan. Maybe instead I should encourage you to think small and obsess on transitory wishes.

CANCER (June 21-July 22) “Wings are a constraint that makes it possible to fly,” Canadian poet Robert Bringhurst reminds us. That will be a good principle for you to keep in mind during your own adventures. I suspect that any liberation you are able to achieve will come as the result of intense discipline. To the degree that you cultivate the very finest limitations, you will earn the right and the power to transcend inhibitions that have been holding you down.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) “The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new.” Every website I consulted agreed that the speaker of this wisdom was Socrates, but I thought the language sounded too contemporary to have been uttered by a Greek philosopher who died 2,400 years ago. After a bit of research, I found the real source: a character named Socrates in Way of the Peaceful Warrior, a New Age self-help book by Dan Millman. I hope this doesn’t dilute the impact of the quote for you. For now, it’s crucial that you not get bogged down in quarreling and brawling. Devote all your energy to creating the future.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22) Do you know that you are a host for more than 10,000 different species of microorganisms? Many of them are bacteria that perform functions essential to your health. So the stunning fact of the matter is that a large number of life forms share your body and constantly help you in ways about which you have no conscious awareness. Might there be other examples of you collecting benefits from unknown sources? Well, do you know who is responsible for providing you with the water and electricity you use? Who sewed your clothes and made your medicine? Who built the roads and buildings you use? This is an excellent time to take inventory of the assistance that you are so fortunate to receive.

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