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COLUMN

Free Will Astrology

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ARIES (March 21-April 19) “An awakened Aries would rather err on the side of making a daring, improvisational mistake than cuddle up with passionless peace,” writes astrologer Hunter Reynolds. “He or she knows that creative conflict can be a greater unifying force than superficial harmony.” This is an excellent keynote for you to keep in mind during the coming days. But make sure your motivations are pure and humble, please. If the daring improvisation you launch is fueled by arrogance or the urge to dominate, your efforts to shake things up for the greater good will fail. Fight against what Reynolds calls “terrified niceness” – but do it with fierce compassion, not sneering rage.

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) Back in 2009, John Allwood, an Australian melon-picker, used his head to smash 47 watermelons in 60 seconds. That broke the previous world record of 40 in a minute, also set by him a couple of years earlier. I’ve chosen him to be your role model for the coming week for two reasons. First, you’re primed to outstrip a personal best you achieved some time back. So do it! Second, it’s a perfect time to use your head in fun and creative ways.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20) According to April Winchell’s book Regretsy: Where DIY Meets WTF, here are some of the treasures you can find for sale at Etsy.com: a toy pig made from a root beer can; a “juicy enchanted pouch” for holding runes; a handmade hornet’s nest; a stuffed feral goat fashioned to resemble a unicorn; fake tapeworms that are actually spray-painted fettucine; and a “haunted Ouija board Las Vegas casino-style blackjack roulette poker chip.” I would absolutely love it if you designed something like this and hawked it on Etsy. Your skill as an idiosyncratic creator will soon be peaking, as will your capacity for marketing the most unique aspects of your schtick and style.

CANCER (June 21-July 22) “Specialization is for insects,” said science fiction writer Robert Heinlein. “A human being should be able to change a diaper, plan an invasion, design a building, write a sonnet, balance accounts, build a wall, set a bone, comfort the dying, take orders, give orders, cooperate, act alone, pitch manure, cook a tasty meal, fight efficiently.” I bring this thought to your attention because it’s an excellent time for you to broaden your understanding and expand your repertoire. How many of the things that Heinlein names can you do? Make a list of your talents, and try to add some new ones to that list in the coming weeks.

LEO (July 23-Aug. 22) A veterinarian in Nashville was asked to do something he had never done: diagnose and treat a wounded whooping crane. Experts devoted to safeguarding the endangered species advised him to wear a billowy white suit. That way the wild bird would be more likely to accept his attention. “You learn very quickly how to communicate dressed as a marshmallow,” the vet said after completing his work. Be prepared for a metaphorically similar encounter. You, too, may face a prospect that resembles interspecies conversation. I hope you’ll be as adaptable as the vet.

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