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Ewwww, SCARY!
Our annual wearable tribute to the truly horrifiying, just in time for Halloween!

 

By Illustration: Plinio Pinto

Download the links below to print out your own Mask

Mask - Accessories

Wow, U.S. Rep. Alan Grayson is one scaaaaaary dude. Those beady eyes. That imposing build. The (now shorn) Rasputinesque beard. The Harvard diploma. The federal deficit–sized ego. He’s the liberal under your bed who’s gonna come out at night, drink your milkshake and take your handguns! We shudder at the mention of him. (One staffer, Billy Manes, hides under his desk whenever Grayson’s name comes up and won’t come out until coaxed with a menthol cigarette.)

Grayson sure gave Republicans a start with his summary of their health insurance plan, delivered on the floor of the U.S. House of Representatives: “If you get sick, America, the Republican health care plan is this: Die quickly! That’s right. The Republicans want you to die quickly if you get sick.”

He said that! He really did! Even emphasized the “die quickly” part, just to make sure no one misunderstood. And when Republicans demanded an apology, guess what? He said no! No apology for you! What’s more, he twisted the knife by apologizing instead to the people who died because they didn’t have health insurance! Do you understand how scary this man is? HE COMMUNICATES WITH THE DEAD!

And if that isn’t horrific enough for you, now he’s got a website called Names of the Dead ­– www.namesofthedead.com – where he catalogs the stories of people who paid the ultimate price for not having access to health care in the richest nation on earth. Only a truly dark, evil genius could enlist the legions of the dead in beating Republicans at their own game.

So cut out the mask on the cover and glue it to a piece of cardboard – or print the handy PDF from our website – and terrify Republicans in your neighborhood this Halloween. (Use the accessories on this page to customize your costume. It’s fun!) Now, if you’ll excuse us, we have to go find a menthol cigarette to get Manes out from under his desk.

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Comments on this story:

Report this comment On 10/28/2009 8:07:57 AM, Anonymous said:

Yeah, Grayson is the guy that calls another female federal employee a whore and is later called outstanding by Obama...real cool OW.

Report this comment On 10/28/2009 1:42:06 PM, Anonymous said:

Why is the Orlando Weekly supporting this woman-bashing representative? Grayson is a complete asshole.

Report this comment On 10/28/2009 2:08:01 PM, Lamar said:

Anon@1:42 - I don't think this article is very supportive.

Report this comment On 10/28/2009 9:14:05 PM, Anonymous said:

Lamar=blind, unintelligent. Grayson=slimeball.

Report this comment On 10/28/2009 11:53:53 PM, Anonymous said:

Why is it that the GOP can trash talk the DEM's? But down talk the GOP oh your a bad man, hang him out to die, throw him out of office. Grayson did lack the usual butt kiss decorum in the senate. So whats the problem? here in the good old U.S.A we the people call that freedom of speech. I'm going to use the Grayson mask as a heroic symbol of freedom

Report this comment On 10/29/2009 7:53:56 AM, Anonymous said:

To 10/28/2009 11:53:53 PM: Apparently you like elected representatives that bash women...real cool (sacrcasm intended).

Report this comment On 10/29/2009 9:38:18 AM, Lamar said:

Why am I blind and unintelligent again? Because I read the story correctly? The headline calls Grayson "truly horrifying". That doesn't sound supportive to me. And yes, Grayson is a slimeball, but I didn't need this latest episode to convince me of that.

Report this comment On 10/29/2009 1:59:37 PM, Anonymous said:

Oh, whatever. He may have used a sexist term, but politically it's more important that he's championing (albeit in a sort of extremist way) health care reform. Arguments that the OW shouldn't support him on grounds of the whore remark are entirely ad hominem (even granting that the whore remark was incredibly unfortunate).

Report this comment On 10/29/2009 2:03:29 PM, Anonymous said:

And to further develop that point, do you think we could find any elected representative who's never made a sexist/racist/otherwise insulting statement? I'm not a Grayson fan, but I think essentially discounting one politician whose verbage we're aware of (having been used once) puts us at risk of also discounting genuine political efforts.

Report this comment On 10/29/2009 7:20:28 PM, Anonymous said:

Grayson is a turd.

Report this comment On 10/29/2009 10:26:39 PM, Dennis MacLaren said:

Now that I'm not hiding behind the mask of anonymity this is for 10/29/2009 7:53:56 AM. No I don't like Grayson he did not get my vote and he does look a bit creepy, most politicians do look creepy to me. What I am saying is this to many politicians are hypocrites they say something and then when they get a bad opinion poll it's time to take it back. I like the fact he stands by his word. And for that he will get my vote for any office he runs for.

Report this comment On 10/29/2009 10:37:39 PM, Dennis MacLaren said:

To 10/29/2009 7:53:56 AM No sarcasm intended

Report this comment On 10/29/2009 10:42:54 PM, Anonymous said:

Lamar has major problems recognizing sarcasm.

Report this comment On 10/29/2009 11:28:49 PM, Lamar said:

Anon@10:42 - There's probably some truth to that statement.

Report this comment On 10/30/2009 10:15:05 PM, Anonymous said:

k street whores = lobbyists

Report this comment On 11/2/2009 11:44:28 AM, Up_in_Smoke said:

I hope the people of Rep. Alan Grayson's district realize that many people across this country are watching you. You, by voting for this madman have unleashed a pox on us all. I beg you Floridians, vote this devisive hater out of your hallowed halls and bring some respect back to your name. We are watching.....Mark in Tennessee

Report this comment On 11/3/2009 10:44:05 AM, Dennis MacLaren said:

Are those the same hallowed halls that gave us 2/3 of a man and manifest destiny? Mark in Tennessee, move down here then your thoughts may count for something. I'm not telling you how to vote in your state. In the immortal words of the famous Little Richard, "Shut up!"

Report this comment On 11/3/2009 12:27:25 PM, Anonymous said:

I love it!! The K-Street Whore!

Report this comment On 11/3/2009 6:10:11 PM, Anonymous said:

I think he's great. AND I'm a woman. He called her a whore because she was a lobbyist, not because she is female. Would a lobbyist be less of a whore if that lobbyist were male? I don't think so, and it doesn't come across (to me) that our rep does. Pick your feminist battles more carefully and they may have more favorable outcomes.

Report this comment On 11/3/2009 6:32:09 PM, Anonymous said:

I think the lobbying community would be offended if as a group, they were all labeled whores - that label is insensitive, intolerant, mean-spirited. Are car salespeople whores too? How about telemarketers? Grayson was insensitive, intolerant, and mean-spirited with the hurtful comments.

Report this comment On 11/3/2009 7:06:14 PM, Anonymous said:

Can you explain, anon, why any US citizen should give a shit if lobbyists are offended? They care nothing about you or I or anyone but corporations. Get a life and think for yourself instead of what Rush Limbaugh or FOX tells you to think. And no, I don't care if that offended you.

Report this comment On 11/3/2009 7:20:56 PM, Anonymous said:

To 11/3/2009 7:06:14 PM: You're being mean - don't freak out. Lobbyists represent a vast spectrum of interests, both for profit and non-profit...just like lawyers, doctors and scientists. Lobbyists for Parkinson's or cancer research don't care about us? Lobbyists don't protect us from government spiraling out-of-control and regulating us into oblivion? Rush and FoxNews don't tell me what to think.

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